It’s Tuesday and it’s raining. Wet shoes and traffic have been the building blocks of this day.
A few months ago I published this post in which I revealed my personal mantra; a statement of affirmation I often recite. To refresh your memory, the mantra begins: I am loved. Those who love me find value in me and the things that I do. However, I do not need to be valuable to be worthy of love….and on it goes.
Oh dear ones, I’ve made a terrible mistake. I was wrong, so, so wrong. I’ve administered a heaping serving of poison into my subconscious for months. My affirmation was complete crap. I didn’t mean for it to be crap, I really thought I was on to something, but I’ve had it backwards this whole time.
I do not need to be worthy of another person’s love to have value.
Be kind. Rewind.
My worth is what use I am to others. Worth is subjective. Worth is cost. Worth inflates and depreciates. But value – value is an inherent trait I possess. I am a trophy of grace. I have been invited to take part in the kind of eternal inheritance that is beyond comprehension. It is my birthright. No matter what I am worth to anyone else, my value remains unchanged.
Oh, dear ones, this is my downfall. I am addicted to the approval of others. I crave it. I hinge my self-concept on feedback. And so, I stay when I should go. I keep fighting when I should walk away. I cave when I should stand.
I forget that my value is static and my worth is contextual.